François-Marie Arouet (Voltaire) - Candide, pt. 2

Chapter 16
The two ride into the jungle and see two girls chased by two monkeys. Thinking he’s saving them, Candide shoots the monkeys. Shocked and confused, he sees the girls mourn the monkeys. Cacambo tells him he’s killed their lovers. Feeling awkward and disgusted, Candide & Cacambo ride on and camp in the territory of the Oreillons, who capture them and plan on killing Candide, seeing as he’s dressed as a Jesuit. Cacambo talks their way out of it, saying that Candide killed a Jesuit, their common enemy, and they are granted passage through the territory.

Chapter 17
The two travelers head for Cayenne, travel down a river and find themselves in a land of fabulous riches. Children are playing with gold and gemstones. The two are given a hospitable welcome and taken to a place like a palace and are told they are in Eldorado, a hidden, enlightened utopia that has no use for material riches.

Chapter 18
An old man explains the nature of Eldorado, which is basically an enlightenment-era paradise where deism is the religion, everybody is carefree and protected by natural borders, but the locals (descendents of a branch of Incas) are forbidden from leaving. After a fun time in Eldorado, the king gives them leave to go and, rather amused, grants them twenty red pack sheep laden with gold and jewels, all of which are worthless in Eldorado.

Chapter 19
The two leave Eldorado, have a good first day of travel, but after that are beset by many disasters that kill off the sheep until only two are left, though both are still loaded with enough treasure to buy several kingdoms. They reach Surinam, a Dutch colony, and see a miserable slave outside of town with a foot and hand cut off, waiting for his master, Mynheer Vanderdendur. The two ride into town and meet a Spanish captain with news. Candide finds out Cunegonde is the favorite mistress of the Governor of Buenos Aires. Candide sends Cacambo to Buenos Aires to get Cunegonde & the old woman, then to meet Candide in Venice. Candide sticks around Surinam for a little while longer and meets Vanderdendur, who cheats him out of most of his money and the last two sheep and sails off without Candide. Candide despairs and books passage on a French ship bound for Bordeaux and puts out a call for a traveling companion. The winner of the search is Martin, a scholar heavily embittered by the world and, despite being a loyal companion to Candide, a total downer.

Chapter 20
On the voyage, Candide & Martin debate over the nature of Optimism vs. Cynicism, neither convincing the other. The ship witnesses a sea battle where a ship sinks. A red sheep swims up to Candide’s ship and is brought aboard. The sunken pirate ship was Vanderdendur’s and Candide recovers some of his treasure. He becomes hopeful that he’ll see Cunegonde again.

Chapter 21
Candide & Martin continue to debate and discuss France, Paris in particular. Martin tells him the country is basically a crazy place.

Chapter 22
They land at Bordeaux and Candide gives his last red sheep to the Academy of Science, which eagerly studied it. They go to Paris. Candide gets very sick and, being wealthy, lots of people tried to make him better (for money) and he got worse. He recovers, but loses a lot of money in the process (its okay, he’s got more). An abbe from Perigord shows them around Paris. They discuss the theater and art in general. The abbe takes him to the home of Mademoiselle Clairon, some kind of high class prostitute/noblewoman. After a fancy dinner and conversation, she takes Candide to the back and they get it on. Candide feels guilty about betraying Cunegonde. One morning in Paris, Candide receives a letter, ostensibly from Cunegonde, telling him she’s in Paris, sick and wants to see him. He rushes to the place and it’s a setup by the abbe, and Candide & Martin are arrested for some reason (something about rounding up foreigners) and Candide bribes the arresting officer to let them go. The two safely reach Normandy and set sail for England with the eventual goal of Venice.

Chapter 23
The ship reaches the coast of England where Candide witnesses the execution of an admiral for not killing enough people in battle (to encourage the other admirals). Horrified, Candide refuses to set foot on England and books passage from the captain to go directly to Venice.

Chapter 24
In Venice, Candide unsuccessfully looks for Cacambo, but runs into Paquette (from the Baron’s castle) and a Theatine monk. She relates her unhappy life as a prostitute and the monk, Brother Giroflee, explains how much he hates being a monk, having been forced into it by his family. Candide gives both a generous amount of money. Candide hears about a Venetian senator named Pococurante, a man rumored to never know sorrow or trouble, and puts in a request to see him.

Chapter 25
Candide & Martin visit Pococurante, an educated government official who is bored with everything he owns and is down on everything; women, art, music, the classics, everything. Martin likes him.

Chapter 26
Candide reunites with Cacambo, who tells him Cunegonde is not in Venice, but in Constantinople. Cacambo is now a slave in service to a master and tells them to follow him. Candide dines with six foreign kings, Sultan Ahmed III, Emperor Ivan of Russia, King Charles Edward of England, a king of Poland, a second king of Poland, and King Theodore of Corsica. All are deposed monarchs given leave to travel and in Venice for the Carnival season.

Chapter 27
Cacambo arranges with a Turkish captain to take his master, Ahmed III & Candide to Constantinople. Cacambo explains that Cunegonde is a slave for another deposed monarch and washing dishes for him and has lost her beauty. Candide sighs and reaffirms his duty to love her, regardless of beauty. Cacambo tells him that he secured Cunegonde’s freedom from the governor of Buenos Aires, but then they were robbed by a pirate captain and sold into slavery. Candide buys Cacambo’s freedom when they reach the Bosporus & sails for the Sea of Marmora. Candide finds among the rowers two who are strangely familiar. They are Dr. Pangloss and Cunegonde’s brother. He frees them and tells the captain to sail to Constantinople. He introduces the two to Cacambo & Martin. They reach Constantinople and set sail for Transylvania to rescue Cunegonde.

Chapter 28
Candide & The Baron make amends about the whole stabbing incident. The Baron says that he was cured of his wound, captured by Spaniards, was reassigned to Constantinople, where he was caught bathing with a handsome young Muslim, which was a serious crime, since he was Christian, and sentenced to the galleys. Pangloss explains that he was going to be burned after hanging, but it rained, so that had to be put off. An autopsy was begun on him, but he was very badly hung and was still alive and he woke up screaming on the table. Pangloss recovered and became a servant to a Venetian merchant and went to Constantinople. One day, Pangloss entered a mosque and tried to hit on a female worshipper. The “priest” there called for help and Pangloss was arrested and sentenced to the galleys. Despite all this, Pangloss still adheres to his original philosophy out of sheer stubbornness.

Chapter 29
They land on the shores of the Sea of Marmora, find the Prince of Transylvania and Candide sees Cunegonde, now ugly and worn. No longer desiring her, but still bound by his honor, they embrace and it’s a happy reunion for everyone, more or less. The Baron again refuses to give Candide Cunegonde’s hand in marriage.

Chapter 30
Despite not really wanting to marry Cunegonde, Candide still wants to go through with it because the Baron pissed him off with his refusal. Pangloss formulates an argument that the Baron has no rights over his sister. Martin wants to throw the Baron into the sea. Cacambo wants to return him to the galley captain he was freed from then sent back to the Jesuits. Cacambo’s plan is carried out quietly. Now married to Cunegonde, Candide and crew, now finally running low on money, settle down to a modest, largely miserable farm life. Paquette & Brother Giroflee arrive at the farm, poor of course, and are taken in. there is much philosophizing. Martin becomes a stoic, the old woman is irascible, Cacambo becomes a grumpy servant, Cunegonde keeps getting uglier, and Pangloss adheres to his philosophy without actually believing it anymore. Candide affirms nothing, only stressing that “we must cultivate our garden.” Eventually, they settle into their new lives and the farm turns out abundant crops in an intentionally listless ending.

Impressions
Candide laments Pangloss’ death in almost every chapter where he thinks Pangloss is dead (which is most of the book)
Martin is a total downer.
Cacambo and the old woman are both resourceful, intelligent sidekicks for their respective masters.. Until the downer ending.
Candide is a real twit, but that’s the point. He’s not even that nice of a guy, since he’s got an bloodthirsty stab reflex. He’s more naïve than nice.
Cunegonde is a human MacGuffin and about as bright as Candide. Still, his treatment of her at the end is pretty damn callow.
It’s a satire, so plot holes (such as people coming back from the dead over and over) aren’t really important. it’s a commentary on (mostly) European society, and the picture it paints is not a cheerful one. Its amusing dark satire, and it accomplishes its goal quite well. If it were a serious tale, then yeah, there's heaps of holes to point out (like Pangloss repeatedly coming back from the dead), but as a satire I can't help but think that all of those are intentional. Voltaire's good at what he does.

François-Marie Arouet (Voltaire) - Candide pt. 1

What
No doubt you’ve heard of Voltaire (1694–1778), the great French Enlightenment Philosopher/Satirist. For most people, that’s all they know about François-Marie Arouet’s pen name. Candide, ou l'Optimisme, published in 1759, is one of his best known works. Voltaire himself was a brilliant thinker, writer, proponent of freedom, anglophile and an all-around think-for-yourself smartass. He’s the kind of guy that gets misinterpreted by later people, such as when people think of him as a strict atheist, when he was actually more of a deist, for example. The copy I’m working from is translated by Lowell Bair and first published in 1959, then again in 2003 by Bantam Classic.

Why
Because Voltaire was a huge literary figure in his own lifetime. He was a big deal known across the Western World. The novella itself is important because of its scathing criticisms of Leibnizian Optimism and Europe in the Age of Enlightenment, and it is ruthless in this mission.

The (Spoiler Free) Basics
Candide (pronounced “Kan-deed”), a young man raised in an idyllic manor, is brought up in an optimistic philosophy that is subsequently deconstructed through a brutal critique of European culture in Voltaire’s lifetime. Satire ensues.

From here on there be spoilers….

Chapter 1
A gentle lad by the name of Candide is raised in the pleasant castle of Baron Thunder-ten-tronckh in Westphalia. He is tutored in Optimism by Pangloss, a philosophy that teaches things like “since pigs were made to eat, we eat pork.” Candide becomes infatuated with the Baron’s daughter Cunegonde, and the two take a cue from Pangloss “giving a lesson” to a chambermaid in the bushes, deiced to “experiment” themselves. The Baron catches them in the act and Candide flees the estate.

Chapter 2
Candide wanders into a town with the ludicrously long name of Waldberghofftrarbkdikdorff, starving and penniless. Two men in uniform (soldiers) feed him, get him drunk and conscript him into the Bulgar army. After a brutal training regimen that nearly kills him, he begs for death when the King of the Bulgars rides up and pardons him and Candide is healed up just in time to go to war.

Chapter 3
After participating in a battle, Candide deserts from the Bulgar camp and flees through several villages that have been slaughtered in graphic detail. He meets a kind Anabaptist named James who helps him out, then meets a man racked with disease.

Chapter 4
The diseased man is Pangloss, Candide’s teacher, who reveals that Cunegonde and everyone else from the Baron’s castle was slaughtered in the war. Cunegonde herself was raped and stabbed. Pangloss also reveals that he is sick with VD from Paquette, the maid from the castle, who had contracted it from a Franciscan. James the Anabaptist pays for Pangloss’ treatment & hires him. The three sail to Lisbon, but get caught in a terrible storm

Chapter 5
James saves a sailor during the storm, who in turn doesn’t save the Anabaptist when James goes overboard and drowns. The ship sinks and only Candide, Pangloss and the sailor survive & wash ashore. They reach Lisbon, which has been devastated by earthquake. The sailor starts looting corpses and goes his merry way. Candide & Pangloss run afoul of an Inquisitor who arrests Pangloss for contradicting free will & Candide for listening to him.

Chapter 6
The leaders of Portugal, in the wake of the earthquake, hold an auto-da-fe (inquisition) & execute several people on rather petty charges, such as a Biscayan marrying the godmother of his godchild & two Portuguese who refused to eat pork (either Jewish or Muslim). Candide is flogged in public & Pangloss is hanged. An aftershock rocks the city. Candide is let go & meets an old woman who tells him to follow her.

Chapter 7
The old woman cares for Candide’s wounds. He heals and she takes him to Cunegonde, who is alive and living in Lisbon.

Chapter 8
Cunegonde tells Candide how she was raped, stabbed but survived thanks to a Bulgar captain. She eventually passed into the company of a lecherous Jew named Don Issachar, moved to Portugal & the Jew and the Inquisitor became rivals for Cunegonde’s affection, though she put out for neither. Don Issachar comes home.

Chapter 9
Candide runs the Jew through with a sword when Issachar becomes furious that another man is in the house. The Inquisitor walks in, sees the body, and Candide kills him too. The old woman tells them they must ride to Cadiz after looting the house for riches.

Chapter 10
They reach Cadiz and Candide joins the Spanish military as a captain after displaying his knowledge of the Bulgar Military Drills. They set sail for the New World.

Chapter 11
The Old Woman tells her story. She was a Pope’s daughter and an Italian princess. On a sea voyage, her ship was beset by pirates and the women were taken by Muslim corsairs and repeatedly raped. They landed in Morocco, finding it in a civil war. The woman’s mother is literally pulled apart by slavering, rapacious moors, but somehow she herself survived, but wound up in a pile of corpses. An Italian eunuch finds her.

Chapter 12
The Old Woman continues. The Italian, a Neapolitan, comforts her, but then takes her and sells her to the Dey of Algiers. She survives a plague, is sold in Tripoli and passed around the Mediterranean until she wound up in a Janissary company besieged by Russians. Facing starvation, the Janissaries cut off a buttock of each of the women for food, but the Russians break through soon after and slaughter them. A French surgeon tends her wounds and she soon floats around Eastern Europe doing menial jobs, never forgetting that she is a pope’s daughter.

Chapter 13
Candide laments Pangloss’ death (again) and the ship lands at Buenos Aires. The Governor, Don Fernando de Ibaraa, y Figueora, y Mascarenes, y Lamburdos, y Suza, lusts after Cunegonde and conspires against Candide, while assuring Candide that he will marry the two lovers. Agents from Spain land, looking for the murderer of the Inquisitor. Sadly, Candide is forced to flee from Buenos Aires and Cunegonde.

Chapter 14
Candide and a servant from Cadiz, Cacambo (a man of very mixed heritage) leave Cunegonde. Cacambo leads him to Paraguay and an independent Jesuit-ruled area at war with Spain. They meet the Reverend Father Provincial in charge of the camp, who turns out to be Cunegonde’s brother, thought dead. They chat cheerfully.

Chapter 15
The brother tells how he survived the sack of the castle and joined the Jesuits. Candide tells him of his intent to marry Cunegonde, which throws her brother into a rage and Candide kills him. Cacambo tells Candide to dress up like the Jesuit so they can escape the camp.

To be continued